Prisoner?

So, I am realizing more and more that I am just not that smart. I know this will baffle those of you who read this, but it is true.  The more I learn about scripture the less I actually know. That seems kinda of backwards to me.

The particular scripture that has slapped me in the noggin this morning is 2 Corinthians 10:5 “…, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.”

Every? Did he say every? I believe he did. This may not seem like much to some of you, but this is what i got out of it:

I used to think that this verse applied to the bad thoughts. The “I hate that guy” thoughts. And it does, but what struck me today is that it applies to the “I love Jesus so much I’m going to become a monk” thoughts too.

Paul urges us to take “every” thought captive.  That even means the thoughts that are of good intent. Too many times today people will just start a ministry because they feel like they have been called to it. But, have they takien that thought captive and poured over it with prayer and wisdom? I have many times jumped far to quickly to do something that I thought was “from God” because it felt right. But, it didn’t turn out for His glory. And most of the time, made me look foolish.

I’m not saying that Papa doesn’t call us to be Radical, or Outrageous. But, He does call us to be wise. I want to be grounded and wise, but the only way that I can do that is by not acting on impulse, even if I think it is what Papa wants. Take your thoughts captive, whether they be good or bad, and see how Papa will bless you.

My name is Jason. I’m a sinner saved by grace, and washed by the blood of the lamb. Desperately dependent on my Savior.

Sin is your nature

I feel as though I have missed the mark on the sin debate. I feel like most of us have. I was raised in the camp that says you have to adhere to a strict standard of rules and regulations to be sin free. I later joined the camp that states all of my sins are covered by Grace: past, present, and future.

But…

I used that as an excuse for my sin. As a way out. As a way to give up responsibility for my actions. “I’m a sinner, that’s my nature. I still love God, but I still sin.” Which is true. We all sin. But, what if we quit using Grace as a crutch? Let me open that up for you.

I try to fight my sin, and since I can’t defeat sin I will always be fighting sin. So, I give in and just say that Grace will cover my sin(and it does), but I feel like a prostitute. I do what I want and then let God cover my butt.

I will never be able to defeat sin. But Papa defeated my sin at salvation. I only have to fight against myself. Against my bad habits. Against my learned thought processes. And guess what, It isn’t easy. It’s a down right battle. Oswald Chambers puts it like this:

“The conflict is along the line of turning our natural life into a spiritual life, and this is never done easily, nor does God intend it to be done easily. It is done only by a series of moral choices.”

It is tough, and unfortunately I don’t always make the best choices, which in turn makes it that much harder. But, I’m trying. I don’t want to cheapen my salvation by doing whatever I want because I know Grace will be there to pick me up. I want to live a life that is pleasing to Papa. I want to be sanctified to Christ. And, I am the only one who can do that. I have to make the moral decisions everyday that will draw me closer to Him.

So what habits or prejudices do you have that need to be diligently and deliberately stricken from your life?

My name is Jason. I’m a sinner covered by grace, washed in the blood, and tying to live a life that is pleasing to my savior.

Self-Realization

I don’t know if it’s just me, or maybe there are other almost 30 year olds out there trying to figure themselves out. I feel like I have lost touch with what makes me tick. With what brings me true joy. I keep getting things wrong. It seems like I keep screwing up.

I feel like I need to “fix” myself. I have been trying to come to a point of Self-Realization. To a place where I have everything figured out and I know what is wrong with me. A place where I not only know what is wrong with me, but why, and how to fix it.

But, what if that’s not the point?

Papa doesn’t want a self-realized man. He simply wants me. He wants the broken me. He wants the hurting me. He wants the me that gets mad at his wife sometimes. And the me that sucks at managing his finances.

He wants all of my Crap just the way it is. He wants everything that I have to offer Him. Good or bad. He wants me and all the baggage so that He can use it. He wants to pour me out, all of me. He wants to use my bad for His good. He wants to use my weakness for His strength. He wants to use my ugliness for His beauty. And He wants to use all of me for His Glory.

Devotion to Papa is not about realizing all of your faults and failures and trying to fix them. It’s about laying all of that down and allowing Grace to wash over you. Let Papa change you, you aren’t strong enough to do it on your own.

My name is Jason. I am a sinner, a failure, and a bastard son. A ragamuffin covered by grace and washed by the Blood of the Lamb.